Life & Style With Mariane

Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”

Nehemiah 8:10

When we think of the word joy, what comes to mind?

Maybe presents, having the time of your life or getting your hearts desires.

But for me, my mindset of what joy truly means was challenged more than a month ago. Though my family has gone through trials years back such as bankruptcy, separation of my parents etc. this one was really different because what is on the line is life – I almost lost my mom and my own life.

Let me share about my mom, I fondly call her “momster” because she is a juxtaposition of a monster (as in a big, hairy, amazingly ferocious human being) and a caring & loving mom. She is one of the strongest human being I know.

She an inspiration to me when it comes to perseverance, forbearance, and loving unconditionally.

She stood the testings in our family, she conquered being suicidal to a woman completely dependent on the Lord.

She is a business development and marketing manager by profession but took a hiatus from her longtime corporate career when she was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy and Hypertension last March. She loves conquering mountains and going on adventure trips that is why her recent trip to the north is no surprise for me and my dad, which mom loves doing.

It was June 9,  a rainy Saturday morning when my dad barged into my room telling me to pray for my mom because she met an accident. The night before she left for a trip to Ilocos Norte with some of her client’s employees then it was in the morning when they met that fateful accident. At first, I was still trying to keep my cool knowing my mom is a strong fellow and have to calm my dad down since he needed to leave Manila and be with my mom in the north.

Alone here in Manila, I am kind of feeling under the weather so I decided to get some nap since I have a bridal shower to go to that afternoon. Hours have passed by, and I woke up feeling feverish with no one to my avail I called up some friends or whom I fondly call as my spiritual family until I am already at the state where I passed out and my cluster mates from church would have to get me from our condo and bring me to the hospital.

As soon as I arrived in the hospital, the nurses got my vital signs my temperature at 39 degrees Celsius and my white blood cells count rising. Quickly, I was given IV meds and set for a CT scan for my abdomen where the pain is arising.

While I was experiencing pain and chills, these people prayed, comforted and even entertained me. I tell you we are the “happiest” people in the ER. I was scared when I got transferred to urgent ER and the resident surgeon started talking to me.

I was so scared that I even brought with me my life insurance policy! Special shoutout to Sun Life.

I was praying to God for help, it feels crazy I was lying in the Emergency Room while my dad is in the middle of a stormy Saturday night and my mom lying in the hospital miles away. As we pray, His comfort and peace came about and by God’s grace, I was discharged with a diagnosis of Diverticulitis. My friends brought me home and took care of me.

The next days were mind-boggling, being an only child would mean dealing with all these alone each day would mean changes and not all change are easy to bear. My dad’s side is from Bicol & my grandpa was also in the hospital for a chronic disease so it’s hard for them to come while my mom’s also is in the far south.

I just thank the Lord for being constant and for sending me brothers and sisters in Christ who became my family. Having this accident also means taking toil to our family finances on the same week our contract in our condo in has ended and we have to make a decision to give it up and look for a cheaper alternative. Together with the ladies I am discipling and other sisters we fixed the moving out and was able to vacate our condo indeed what an adjustment.

I literally felt #adulting pouring on me. I remember being alone at home, praying and crying to God because I don’t understand why, for a moment I asked Him why he allowed this because coming in to 2018 was quite a challenge for me from 2017 of heartbreaks, disappointments & unfulfilled aspirations we have this.

But through His Word, I found comfort.

“These things I have spoken to you so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33

I can still rejoice in Him – in who He is, what He loves, how He feels about me. If I turn my eyes away from my problems in hard times and rejoice in Him, in who He is, then I gain strength to face whatever life throws at me.