Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”
When we think of the word joy, what comes into mind?
Maybe presents, having the time of your life or getting your hearts desires. But for me, my mindset of what joy truly means was challenged more than a month ago. Though my family has gone through trials years back such as bankruptcy, separation of my parents etc. this one was really different because what is on the line is life.
Let me share about my mom, I fondly call her “momster” because she is a juxtaposition of a monster (as in a big, hairy, amazingly ferocious human being) and a caring & loving mom. She is one of the strongest human being I know. She an inspiration to me when it comes to perseverance, forbearance, and loving unconditionally. She stood the testings in our family, she conquered being suicidal to a woman completely dependent on the Lord.
She is a business development and marketing manager by profession but took a hiatus from her longtime corporate career when she was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy and Hypertension last March. She loves conquering mountains and going on adventure trips that is why her recent trip is no surprise for me and my dad which mom loves doing.
It was June 9, a rainy Saturday morning when my dad barged into my room telling me to pray for my mom because she met an accident. The night before she left for a trip to Ilocos Norte with some of her client’s employees then it was in the morning when they met that fateful accident. At first, I was still trying to keep my cool knowing my mom is a strong fellow and have to calm my dad down since he needed to leave Manila and be with my mom in the north.
Alone here in Manila, I am kind of feeling under the weather so I decided to get some nap since I have a bridal shower to go to that afternoon. Hours have passed by, and I woke up feeling feverish with no one to my avail I called up some friends or whom I fondly call as my spiritual family until I am already at the state where I passed out and my cluster mates from church would have to get me from our condo and bring me to the hospital. As soon as I arrived in the hospital, the nurses got my vital signs my temperature at 39 degrees Celsius and my white blood cells count rising. Quickly, I was given IV meds and set for a CT scan for my abdomen where the pain is arising.
While I was experiencing pain and chills, these people prayed, comforted and even entertained me. I tell you we are the “happiest” people in the ER. I was scared when I got transferred to urgent ER and the resident surgeon started talking to me. I was praying to God for help, it feels crazy I was lying in the Emergency Room while my dad is in the middle of a stormy Saturday night and my mom lying in the hospital miles away. As we pray, His comfort and peace came about and by God’s grace, I was discharged with a diagnosis of Diverticulitis. My friend brought me home and took care of me.
The next days were mind-boggling, being an only child would mean dealing with all these alone each day would mean changes and not all change are easy to bear.
I just thank the Lord for being constant and for sending me brothers and sisters in Christ who became my family. Having this accident also means taking toil to our family finances on the same week our contract in our condo in Ortigas has ended and we have to make a decision to give it up and look for a cheaper alternative. Together with the ladies I am discipling and other sisters we fixed the moving out and was able to vacate our condo indeed what an adjustment.
After which, my mom was brought back to Manila via ambulance from Ilocos Norte and admitted at The Medical City last June 14 where her operations took place.
Here’s her condition:
Bilateral Hip Pain with acetabular fracture hip dislocation of the left
A fem neck fracture on the right
Other significant findings: (+) Racoon Eyes Left with subconconjuctival hemorrage Ecchymosis on left chin to left maxillary area
Ecchymosis on the right shoulder, right breast left arm
Hematoma on volar aspect of right wrist
Swelling on the right wrist
Right lower extremity externally rotated
Left lower extremity on neutral position
By God’s grace, her operations were successful and recovery is on its way. But because of the impact of the accident, it took a toil on her health and resulted in her disability.
Despite all these things happening in my family, I wouldn’t know what to do if not for God. It is like a complete turn around of our lives. Crazy isn’t I thought these things only happen in TV somewhat an intersection of a medical and legal Koreanovela. With all these, I know that I can still rejoice because I am confident in who my God is.
‘Rejoice IN the Lord, again I say, rejoice” (Philippians 4)
I can still rejoice in Him – in who He is, what He loves, how He feels about me. If I turn my eyes away from my problems in hard times and rejoice in Him, in who He is, then I gain strength to face whatever life throws at me.
I praise God for sustaining me and my family through all these and even giving me the privilege to serve Him through B1G True Life Retreat and B1G Friday’s. Indeed, I can say that it is no longer I who lives but Christ who lives in me. If it was me, it’s so easy to give up or succumb myself to self-pity and depression but it is the peace of the Lord that transcends understanding that reigns in us.
Going home from the retreat would mean facing the reality of my mom’s accident. As an only child, this would mean doing most of the legwork for the family since these things can only be processed by immediate family members. I’ve experienced waking up at 5AM just to make it in line at PSCO as I was there were so many things that God allowed me to see and feel – to have a bigger heart for others.
I’ve lined up with many people whose look of hopelessness is evident on their faces there was even a time that I am seated next to a lady who is with her daughter who has cerebral palsy. My heart goes for them and the best thing I could give some of those I have encountered is prayer.
Each waking moment, God is teaching me and family dependence. There was even a moment when I broke down at the PWD Office. I was praying hard so my mom’s PWD ID can be released and praise God it was! Truly, it is the Lord who expedite everything, not us or even our own strength and abilities.
Aside from peace, the Lord truly knows our heart’s desire. God knows how much I’ve been longing to dance this is something that I already surrendered to God months ago no matter how much I love to do so I will only dance again if He tells me so. And He gave me the privilege of leading dance worship during B1G True Life’s Reunion what a timing isn’t?
Maybe God is really teaching me that worship is not dependent on your circumstance whatever trials and testing you are facing we can still worship Him in spirit and truth because of who He is. He is indeed, my source of strength and joy!
Honestly, of all the dance ministering and performing that I did in my lifetime this one means so much that I can still stand and lead people despite the fact that my mom is in the hospital bed, our financial liabilities piling up each day and no definite source on where to get it. When God allows you to go through it, He will walk you through it.
There are moments when I would cry out to God because I don’t know what to do anymore, or I don’t feel okay anymore. It when we come in brokenness that God’s power works in our midst. When we surrendered everything and tells Him – Let thy will be done. Everything s on cue, even the place that we are moving in! God really has His perfect timing.
Our hospital bills reached almost 700,000 through the help of different people, our own funds. PCSO, Philhealth we are left to raise 300,000 to pay the credit card which was used to pay the hospital so mom can be discharged.
Mom was discharged last June 26, and is getting home care and continous Physical Therapy and Rehabilitation which costs at 1,500/session and given thrice a week together with follow up XRay, CT Scan and Check ups on the weeks to come.
In behalf of our family, we would like to thank everyone who helped to The Medical City, CCF Family, B1G Singles Ministry, Unique/ God is Able Ministry for the wheelchair and a lot more.
How can you help?
Please continually pray for mom’s recovery and provision in our family. Having her in this condition really made a huge financial impact on their family. Please do pray for me as well since I have to go through screening next month to make sure that the pain that I was feeling isn’t caused by colon cancer. But amidst all these, God is always sovereign and in control.
1. Through Financial Support
If the Lord will touch your heart to give financially you may course it through:
*If you have been touched or inspired by this post feel free to comment. Also, if you have any questions about God and Christianity or you are in need of prayers you can reach me through my email or social media accounts placed above.